Friday, February 28, 2014

that disease called perfectionism

I used to suffer from that dreaded disease called Perfectionism. It was awful. It sucked all the fun out of far too many experiences. It brought on unneeded stress and anxiety, and on more than several occasions it caused me to have situational life paralysis. It was much too heavy a burden to carry. I know where I picked up the dreaded virus but that's another story altogether. The important thing is that I eventually recognized it, but that awareness was only realized after a major "slap upside my head" (not literally) and many months of guided introspection and discovery.

Perfectionism is certainly not all it's cracked up to be. It has a really cruddy underbelly. The cure was painful indeed but extremely freeing. The perfectionism virus still rears its ugly head from time to time, but now I recognize it right away and defeat it before it can take hold. There's a big difference between working hard to do your best and striving for perfect as the only acceptable outcome. Shooting for perfect and not attaining it will crush your happiness, cause you to miss the experience of a job well done, kill your drive to try again and keep you from success.

Let's be honest, there is no such thing as the perfect person, a perfect wedding, a perfect live performance, the perfect relationship, a perfect home, a perfect job or the perfect anything else for that matter. We're all flawed but we're all worth knowing, worth loving despite our foibles. So don't let perfectionism rob you of a great experience or stop you from shooting for your dream. Don't let it steal your happiness. Give yourself a break. Lay down the burden of perfectionism and enjoy your life.



11 comments:

Theresa said...

Hi Bev, I wanted to stop by and say "thank you for stopping by":) We live in a NOT SO perfect world and need not put so much pressure on ourselves. Some of my favorite times are when a plan turned out differently and not so perfect! Have a blessed day and again, thanks for stopping by and leaving your sweet comment! HUGS!

Tracey said...

I found myself nodding in agreement as I read each word of your post. It's hard to let go of perfection, but once you do life is so much more enjoyable and it makes breathing easier too.
Have a great weekend.

Tessa~ Here there be musing said...

What a wonderful post! A fantastic story of accomplishment. And what an accomplishment. I am so proud of you.

Nothing compared to how proud you must be, of yourself! Yes! I say we should be proud of all our accomplishments. It is not being "self-puffed-up". We deserve it!

Plus, it gives us a push, to accomplish the next thing. Because as you say, none of us is perfect. But we often can find some aspect of our personality, which could use a bit of concentration. :-)

Gentle hugs,
Tessa~

Debbie said...

i enjoyed reading this and dislike perfection!!

i have to be careful not to get sucked in!!

Dee said...

I struggle with that too. Most of the time I can keep it under control, but once in awhile it rears it's ugly head and bites me in the butt.

A Place to Reside said...

I'm definitely learning this as well, day by day.

live and learn said...

I too am a recovering perfectionist. The biggest problem it caused for me was immobilization. If I couldn't figure out the perfect course of action, I wouldn't do anything. I still struggle with it, but now I recognize the problem and am able to deal with it successfully most of the time.

karyn said...

Oh Bev - how very timely this is for me. I stopped by to check out your Corner View from last week and to thank you for your kind and encouraging comments about my cards - and I found this. I too struggle with perfectionism - particularly around my creative endeavours. Some times I'm OK but recently I have had a real 'dark night of the soul over my various creative endeavours (classical singing, Eliza's Dream and my writing) - none of them are good enough for my Perfectionism Gremlin and I've been badly tempted to give up and return to the 'real world'. Thank you for sharing this post - and well done you for conquering your Perfectionism Gremlin

Lorrie said...

Perfectionism does ugly things to one's soul. I keep working away at banishing it from my life. This is a very thoughtful post. Thank you.

Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment on my blog. I'm glad I came over to meet you.

I'm Sara. said...

Thank-you for writing this. I have deep roots of "perfectionism" that have made life so hard and sad sometimes. I am working to overcome this and get rid of the voice that says "try harder" about everything all the time. Our best is best.

karen said...

The older I get the more loosey goosey I become with my expectations, I am a perfectionist in my crafting but in life I try to live life love life and enjoy each moment. Great post :)