Friday, January 23, 2015

chipping away at your demons

For me, the biggest limitations in my life are all in my head. They’re pretend, make-believe, figments of my imagination. I bet that the same goes for you.

If you pay attention, you’re probably going to find that you have distorted, maybe even completely incorrect, beliefs in your head. Ideas planted there by others when you were young, or by unthinking and insensitive people as an adult. I find that for myself, those false ideas created some mighty walls in my psyche, but I’m learning to spot them.

The really stubborn ones are those comments and criticisms that are foisted upon us as a child by some adult in your life. Those get planted deep. The barbs you receive as an adult are different, in part because they’re newer and create a new, fresh wound. Once you recognize them though, you can start to chip away at those demons that stand in your way.
We’re not meant to sit on the edge of our dreams and we’re doing ourselves a disservice if we let someone else’s ideas about us stand in our way. So pay attention to those fleeting thoughts. Observe when you get anxious about trying something new or pushing outside of your comfort zone.  When you recognize that thought that makes your heart pound a little harder or causes you to break out in a sweat, vocalize out loud: “There it is!” or “There’s one!” The very act of saying the words out loud will halt the negative thought that’s rearing its ugly self. Do that enough times and you’ll find that the frequency of that particular message will begin to slowly dissipate from your inner dialogue. In any case, in that moment, you take away its power. Then what? Well, then you push yourself forward. You are in no way alone in this. We all have these inner struggles.    

One I’m working on now is dealing with some hurtful words that were said to me after doing something that was really tough for me…on a stage…in public. Hurtful words said not once, not twice, but multiple times by someone who selfishly, wasn’t thinking about their impact. Ouch!  Certainly it's not all about that moment but that insensitivity was more than enough to jar me. So what am I doing now? I’m recognizing the words and feelings when they pop up and I’m chipping away at the demons that were planted that day. I’m working to take away their power.

My hope for you, is that you can chip away at your own personal demons and begin to take your power back too. 



Anonymous said...

Excellent post.

I don't think there is anyone out there that doesn't, at least once in awhile, play an old tape in their head. Time to delete those old tapes.

They aren't who we are today.

Thanks for the reminder.

Unknown said...

So true for me. Reading this today was spot on for me, thank you. I am venturing into something new and have started sharing it with folks and mostly positive response has been helpful. But the nay-sayers and eyes rolling by a few have stuck to my confidence and I need to shake them off and move forward. I like the idea of saying something out loud to change the course of my own thinking back to the positive.